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BMW 750i
Take a deep breath—relax—it's all just been a terrible dream. BMW is loath to admit that there was anything wrong with the distinctly challenging styling of the current 7-series, of course. But even with fingers plugged in its corporate ears, going "na na na" at full volume, Munich couldn't shut out all the taunting of the design direction that broke cover with this full-size über-barge. Three years later, the redesign seen here is a welcome change. Which is why the 7's aesthetic makeover has been far more comprehensive than BMW's usual midterm Botox trick of new fenders and clear, instead of orange, turn-indicator lenses. Seven Version 4.5 (if you're keeping track) gets a new hood, sill extensions, headlights, and a completely new trunk lid. Plus, of course, slightly more muscular fenders and those all-important clearlensed indicators. At the front, the new look seems to be an effective pastiche of executive-car design themes, pleasing but unmemorable. At the rear, the improvement is far more dramatic—the cooked-too-long-in-the-microwave trunk lid is gone, replaced by a far more conventional one that radiates distinctly Lexus vibes when seen from medium distance. Good thing the BMW badge is still prominent, as fellow road-users might otherwise be left unaware of precisely what cut them off at 85 mph, making that off-ramp with inches to spare.

Inside the cabin, far less has changed. The 7-series is still big and leathery, although its switchgear lacks the touchy-feely tactility you'd find in an Audi A8. And the iDrive controller is still smugly situated atop the center console, charged with carrying out most of the car's control functions. Most, but not all. In what's a fairly substantial climb-down in BMW terms, the stereo comes with a separate "source" button, to eliminate the previous need to twist-and-click your way through sub-menus to change between the radio and the inevitable Billy Joel CD.

The biggest changes are under the hood, namely the new V-8 engine. As the full-spec V-12 760 (look right) doesn't sell in big numbers, BMW has upgraded the existing V-8 to ensure the sort of smooth, cell phone-pressed-to-ear overtaking power that 7-series drivers demand—loudly—to their accountants, who are probably driving other 7-series, all at the same time. We tested the new 750i, replacement for the 745i, now packing a 4.8-liter V-8 with 360 hp at a zingy 6300 rpm and 360 lb-ft of torque at 3400 rpm—a 35-hp and 30-lb-ft gain over its predecessor. Transmission duties are still handled by a 6-speed ZF automatic controlled by a steering column stalk and "up/down" manumatic buttons on the steering wheel. The V-12 engine continues as before—and non-American markets also get a smaller V-8, a straight six, and two turbodiesels.

We're in the south of Spain for the dynamic interrogation and, as you'd probably imagine, the 750i copes pretty well. Whatever you thought of the outgoing car's styling, there was no arguing that it steered, stopped, and went with Benz-baiting aplomb. Only the most minor of suspension tweaks have taken place ("ze track is wide by 0.55 inches," we're told, proudly) and the driving experience remains pretty much identical. Or, to summarize, loads of grip fading to eventual front-end push, with the occasional squally burst of low-speed power sliding (provided traction control is isolated via a 14-point iDrive procedure). The innovative, body roll-limiting Active Roll Stabilization system continues, as do adjustable electronic dampers. The cabin is comfortable and suitably hushed, even at the sort of 120-mph-plus cruising speeds that our Spanish test route encouraged. And ride quality stays decent on the all-important bigger wheels. 20-inchers are going to be costly, but like all recent BMWs, only the hugest rims have a chance of filling those vast wheel arches.

Attacking the mountain roads of Andalusia, heading towards San Pedro de Alcantara (the patron saint of really bad passing maneuvers) our confidence levels remained high. If there's a better handling full-sizer, we've yet to drive it. In spite of the current lousy exchange rate, BMW won't increase its prices significantly, meaning around $70,000 to $120,000-plus for the new 760Li. Now that the 7 doesn't have to go around with its head in a paper bag any more, that kind of money makes a strange kind of sense.